


Your Love Is A Weapon

by Synnerxx



Category: Metallica, Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: 100 Drabble Challenge, Age Difference, Angst, Drabble, Drabble Collection, Fluff, M/M, Modern Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-10
Updated: 2017-02-20
Packaged: 2018-03-11 10:47:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 2,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3324692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Synnerxx/pseuds/Synnerxx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They're trying to get it right. (A drabble collection for the relationship between James and Dean. OTP: Rebels Without A Cause)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> 100 drabbles of a 100 words each. rating subject to change. updated every 10 drabbles
> 
> prompt: nightmare

They both have nightmares. They wake up in the middle of the night, sweating and shaking and unable to shake off the effects of the dream. They don’t talk about the images in their heads, their memories that haunt them. James will sit up with Dean on the nights he doesn’t want to sleep. Dean gets up with James in the middle of the night, giving him space, but letting him know he’s there should James need him.

It’s not perfect, but they work it out the best they can while their demons nip at their heels in their dreams.


	2. untouchable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: untouchable

Sometimes Dean gets jealous of the bond between James and Lars. He scowls at photographs where Lars is tucked up against James’s side, arm around his waist while they both smile for the camera. He knows that they used to have a thing going years ago. He’s pretty sure there isn’t anything going on now, but that still doesn’t prevent him from being jealous. There’s just something so smug about the look on Lars’s face in the pictures that makes Dean irritated.

He’d deny it with his dying breath, but he’s jealous and he hates that he is this way.


	3. attention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: attention

It’s intense, having Dean’s full attention fixed on him. He’s been told that he’s an intense guy before, but he feels so exposed and vulnerable when he’s got Dean’s attention firmly on him as Dean watches him with those too blue eyes. He squirms under the gaze, wanting Dean to look away, but loving it at the same time. He shivers, looking up at Dean, watching him as Dean watches him. There’s a lot of watching going on because Dean can be very patient when he wants to be and James isn’t very patient at all. Not like Dean is.


	4. relief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: relief

There’s always a sense of relief that hits Dean square in the chest when James walks into whatever hotel room they’re in for the night, back from a stretch of touring. There’s always a fear that creeps into the back of Dean’s mind that James will leave him one day. He comes up with all these reasons in his head from their age difference to their jobs, building them up to towering heights while he and James are apart. Then they’re all shattered to little pieces when James comes into the room and grins at him, saying “I missed you.”


	5. misjudged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: misjudged

Dean is a fan of Metallica, had been for a while before he met James. He had his opinions of the band and the members, even James. He had thought them all spoiled rockstars that too way too long to put out a new album in recent years. Beyond that, he never gave them much thought beyond the occasional “Damn, they’re hot” passing thought. Then he moved on to something else more pressing.

When he does meet James for the first time, James is sweet and friendly and smart, holy hell, is the dude smart. He had totally misjudged James.


	6. paper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: paper

James carries around this notebook full of scribbles and song lyrics and drawings and Dean is so fucking curious about it, he could die. Like that stupid cat or whatever. James doesn’t let him read it, doesn’t show him anything in it. Dean had thought no one was privy to the words and pictures in the book until he walked in on James and Lars both hunched over it, talking quietly. He ignores the flush of jealousy and walks away, ignoring James calling after him. Fuck him and fuck Lars and fuck that stupid notebook that he wants to read.


	7. mask

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: mask

James is the only one, with the exceptions of Seth and Roman, who have seen through his mask so easily. James tears down his walls and worms his way under his skin and Dean would be furious if it were anyone else. No one should be able to do that with such ease, but James can and does. He takes off Dean’s mask and lets him relax and be himself and it’s so different from every other relationship he’s ever had. It’s hard to let it all go, but for James, he makes the effort and is rewarded for it.


	8. up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: up

“Are you watching that movie again? You know it makes you cry.” Dean asks as he walks into the living room, dropping his bag by the couch.

James sniffles and wipes his eyes. “It was on the movie channel and there was nothing else on.”

“Right. You know we have like five hundred channels.” Dean rolls his eyes, but drops down on the couch next to James.

“It’s such a good movie!” James protests, turning to kiss Dean.

“Mr. Rockstar crying over a kid’s movie. You’re such a softie.” Dean snickers, kissing James’s cheek.

James pouts at him even more.


	9. time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: time

They haven’t been together very long, less than three years, but Dean feels like it’s been forever some days. He can read James’s moods and expressions almost as well as Lars can these days. (Absolutely no one can read James better than Lars and that sometimes bothers Dean, but he puts a lid on it and shoves it down.) The time seems to pass without him really noticing it. They do celebrate their anniversary every year and it’s nice. Dean’s never really had that before. It’s nice. He likes it. He likes James. He loves James. More than he thought.


	10. bruise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: bruise

There’s a bruise on James’s neck, just off the side of the skull tattoo that Dean can’t stop staring at. He gave it to James last night and the sight sends a rush of heat through him. The bruise is an angry red-purple and Dean wants to run his tongue over it again and again just to hear James whimper underneath him. He shifts in his chair, trying to ignore his arousal because the breakfast bar in their hotel surrounded by coworkers and friends is definitely not the place to get a hard on. He sighs and stares some more.


	11. distance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: distance

Sometimes the distance between them, the thousands and thousands of mile between them, gets to be a little hard to bear. The empty beds with cold sheets are intimidating sometimes and they get weary of having to sleep alone with only phone calls and texts to keep them company. They love their jobs, but the long stretches of time spent away from each other - James on tour with Metallica and Dean on tour with WWE - can be frustrating. But that moment when they’re together again, there’s no distance between them. They press as close as they can get to together.


	12. triumph

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: triumph

Dean watches from across the studio as James and Lars sit close together, talking softly. He watches the way Lars leans much closer than necessary to James, hand landing on James’ thigh as he shifts closer to him, pointing to something on a piece of paper. Dean watches for a few more moments before getting up and going over to James, smiling down at him, pleased when James immediately gives him his full attention. He shoots Lars a triumphant look and bends to kiss James, humming as he kisses him back. He ignores the irritation he feels coming from Lars.


	13. home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: home

Dean marvels a little at the way James’ arms feel like home like nothing and no one else ever has. He curls up closer to James and sighs in contentment when James’ arms tighten around him, drawing him against his body. He rests his head against James’ chest, listening to the steady rhythm of James’ heart beat and closes his eyes, relaxing. It took him a while, but he’s finally found the place where he truly belongs. No matter where he is in the world, as long as he has James, he’s home. Nothing else can compare to their love.


	14. commanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: commanding

James is a commanding figure, even when he’s not onstage. There’s just something about him that demands your attention. Of course he does. He’s a rockstar and he’s used to getting what he wants from whoever he wants. He carries himself with confidence and certainty, sure of who he is and comfortable in his own skin. Dean tries to keep his eyes off of him for as long as he can, but it’s never long before he’s giving in and looking at James, seeing that familiar smirk on his lips. He smirks back, knowing he’s in for a good time.


	15. escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: escape

James is his escape. When the world is just a little too much, when everything becomes just a little unbearable, when it all feels like it’s two seconds away from crashing down, James is there. He curls into James’ arms, lets James whisper soothing nonsense to him, taking comfort in the quiet rumble of his voice. He likes the way his name sounds on James’ lips when he says Dean. 

He drifts off, content to lay with James and let James talk to him, not really listening as he falls asleep, but whatever James is talking about colors his dreams.


	16. mellow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: mellow

James has mellowed out a lot. Certainly post-rehab, he’s a much calmer individual. His fuse is much longer now, although he does still have buttons that can be pressed by the right people. Dean can do it now, but he’s not on the level that Lars is, that Dave is, but they don’t talk about Dave Mustaine. They just don’t. Dean figures James is still in love with Dave, but won’t admit it. Dean’s okay with that. He’s the one James comes home to after all. Dave isn’t in the picture. Even if James’ occasional fury at him still persists.


	17. discussion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: discussion

“What do you want me to say, Dean? I can’t just up and leave right now. We’re working on the album, we’re working on that book. I have to be here.” James sighs, pressing the phone harder against his ear.

Dean doesn’t say anything for a long moment. “Yeah, it’s fine.” 

James frowns at the defeat in Dean’s voice. “Hey, I’ll make it up to you. Give me another few weeks, okay? Then I’ll come out and stay with you.”

“Don’t worry about it, James. You have more important things to do. I get it.” Dean mumbles and hangs up.


	18. leather

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: leather

“How the fuck do you still look so damned hot in leather pants at your age?” Dean asks, a smirk curling at the edges of his mouth. 

James arches an eyebrow. “Are you calling me old?”

Dean’s smirk gets a little more wicked. “Well, you’re not exactly a spring chicken, are you?”

“Enough of a spring chicken that I can still fuck you through the mattress though, right?” James matches Dean’s smirk.

A wave of heat slides through Dean and he eyes James in his leather pants again, lingering on the bulge in his pants. “Let’s go to the hotel.”


	19. war

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: war

Dean always knows when James is pissed off at Lars. He comes home and shuts the front door just a touch too hard. He storms into the bedroom and takes off his boots, throwing them towards the closet. He paces, running his fingers through his hair and tugging on it lightly. Dean knows better than to approach him just yet. He waits for the anger to burn out, for James to calm. Then he comes to him with soft words and gentle kisses, so different for him. But he does his best to help James calm down from the war.


	20. neutral

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: neutral

He really tries to stay neutral when James bitches about Lars because he knows James really does want them to get along. Even though Lars is James’ ex and Dean is the current boyfriend. Dean really doesn’t think they’ll ever really like each other, but he can at least be civil for James’ sake and Lars seems to have adopted that stance too. Sometimes Lars really tries Dean’s patience and he doesn’t have all that much to begin with. His subtle manipulations and the things he says to James sometimes really gets to Dean. But he stays neutral for James.


	21. child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: child

“Do you….nevermind.” James mutters and rolls over in bed.

Dean blinks sleepily at him. “Do I what?”

“Nothing. Go to sleep.” James’ muffled voice says.

Dean sits up a bit. “Just ask. I promise I won’t freak or get mad or upset or whatever.”

James turns over again and looks up at him for a long, silent moment. “Do you want kids?”

Dean doesn’t hesitate. “No.” 

“Oh.” James looks down and nods slowly. “Okay.”

“Do you?” Dean asks back, tilting his head. 

James just sighs and lays back down, not answering. 

Dean really hates it when he does that.


	22. click

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: click

The click of the lock turning on the door makes James look up and smile when Dean steps into the house. Dean shuts the door behind him and hangs his keys up. He turns and smiles at James, happy to have a bit of a break and to be able to sleep in their bed tonight and spend time with James. 

“Hey, babe.” James greets him.

“Hey yourself. Man, you’re a sight for sore eyes.” Dean chuckles.

“Speak for yourself.” James smiles, very happy to have Dean home.

“What are we doing for dinner tonight? I’m starved.” Dean sits down.


	23. speech

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: speech

“I really hate giving speeches.” James grumbles, scribbling something down in his notebook.

“I thought Lars usually gave the speeches and shit.” Dean comments from the couch.

“Yeah, he’s usually the mouthpiece, but he’s pissed at me, so this is his way of getting back at me because he knows I hate speeches.” James scratches a line out and rewrites it.

“What’s the speech for?” Dean asks, curious.

“About the history of the band and shit. We’re being honored at some metal tribute fest thing. I don’t know. I wasn’t listening to Lars when he was telling me.” James sighs.


	24. desperation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: desperation

There’s a desperation in James’ kisses, in the way he clings to Dean sometimes that Dean can’t quite figure out. There’s a wild look in his blue eyes that gives Dean pause, wondering what’s wrong. He never pushes, never tries to pry the information out of James, knowing it only makes him shut down on him. He tries to wait James out, wait for him to tell him what’s going on in his own time. It always feels like James is on the edge of something, something big, something he’s scared of, maybe, but Dean doesn’t know what it is.


	25. complex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: complex

Dean and James are both pretty complex people. Neither of them are great at holding onto their relationships with anyone in a completely healthy way. James, at least, had Lars, but Dean wouldn’t call that healthy at all. Dean had Seth before James, but that was over and done with and didn’t need to be discussed. They had each other and they were trying to be the best versions of themselves with each other, but it wasn’t quite where they should be, no matter how hard they tried. They loved each other, but it wasn’t an all-consuming kind of love.


	26. alley

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: alley

James pushes Dean against the brick wall of the alley, dropping quickly to his knees. He fumbles Dean’s belt open, shoving his jeans down enough to curl his fingers around Dean’s cock and stroke him. 

It’s dangerous doing this here, outside the venue where Metallica had just played, but that’s part of the thrill. 

Dean’s fingers tangle in his hair as he swallows Dean down, taking him apart with ease.

Dean bites his lips to muffle his noises, aware that they can’t be caught like this. He tips his head back against the wall, pushing his hips against James’ face.


	27. whisper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: whisper

The first time James says ‘I love you’ to Dean, he whispers it, thinking Dean is asleep. Dean’s not, but he doesn’t let James know that. It’s a big step for James, who hasn’t really loved many people in his life, not like this. Dean knows he needs to work up to it, needs to feel secure when saying it. Dean knows it isn’t easy for James to open up like that to people, having been hurt in the past. He can relate to that. So he’ll let James whisper that he loves him and pretend he doesn’t hear it.


	28. meticulous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: meticulous

Dean leans against the entryway to the kitchen, watching James set out his pencils and other art supplies that he’ll need for whatever piece he’s working on today. James isn’t, by any means, the neatest person in the world, but he’s always so meticulous with his art, always so careful to lay things out neatly where he needs them, arranged just so on his work surface. He opens his sketchbook and starts working on his drawing, all harsh black lines and gray shading. Dean always likes to watch James work. He gets so absorbed in it and Dean enjoys it.


End file.
